Depression Stinks!

I just updated “My Bipolar Story” here on my blog.  The last few days I’ve been trying to fight off some really bad depression.  This downswing that I’m in right now is the biggest and longest downswing that I’ve had since I started treatment.  I’m just really glad that I’ve got a really great God to help me get through this.

The next two paragraphs are the parts that I updated on my story.  I figured that since my story is pretty long I’d just repost the two main paragraphs and save everyone from having to re-read the whole thing.  Besides, this is where I’m really at right now.

Being depressive is just the opposite of the manic side.  When I’m in a depressive or mixed state, there are times that I don’t even feel like getting out of bed.  When I’m depressed I have very little energy.  Many times I feel like I’m stepping off of this Merry-Go-Round we call life and just stand there and let the world go on without me.  To put it simply, depression stinks!  

While a little bit of mania can be good & fun, there is nothing fun about depression.  Depression steals your life from you.  Many times when I get really depressed I sometimes feel like crying but I really don’t even have the energy to cry so I just shut down and don’t do anything.  I do try to write when I’m depressed as that is the best therapy that I’ve found to help me cope.

Once again I am blessed here with having a wife who encourages me to get going when I myself don’t feel very much like going.  Also, my wife does a nice job of monitoring me when I’m down to make sure that I stay safe.  I would say that 99+% of the time I’m no danger to myself, but once in a great while I do get really down.  In our vows we both said “For better, for worse…”  I have to give it to my wife here as she really does stand with me and many times for me when I get really depressed.  I really can’t come up with words on how much it means to me to have a Godly wife that lives by our vows.

I’ll get through this that much I do know.  How do I know I’ll get through this?  First of all I have God’s Word telling me that God will help me to get through this.  I also have a great Care Team that is there to help me through this depression swing.  Add to that the wonderful, loving wife that God gave me and yes, I do have the hope and belief that I will get through this.

Be Blessed!

BIG SCOTT