I guess I’ll start this blog off with some good news and some bad news. The good news is that I didn’t gain any weight. The bad news is that I didn’t loose any either. The good news is that my diabetes is finally stabilized that I can get new glasses. The bad news is that I’m still in my spiritual drought.
I went to the doctor again yesterday and the doctor was pleased with my diabetes and my efforts to loose weight. The doctor however did give me a bit of bad news that is kind of personal so I won’t share it here. Nothing serious, it was just something I was hoping for. Now it’s more of an inconvenience than anything. Overall though my doctor is very pleased with me!
I wish I knew why I’m in a spiritual drought. I try to pray every day. I go to church on Sunday and prayer meeting on Wednesday. I try to read in the Word every night. I watch Christian programming quite a bit of the time rather then watching a bunch of the junk that’s on TV. I do think that one of the things that is dragging me down right now is the fact that I want to go back to work really, really bad but my health just isn’t quite there yet. That is one thing that I wrestle with on a daily basis.
I know the Lord is in control and is taking care of me and my family and for that I am extremely grateful. One thing that I’ve been wrestling with though is my reading in Proverbs. There are 31 Proverbs and I try to read one every night. One thing that has been wearing me down there is Proverbs talks distitutely about a man that doesn’t work and doesn’t provide for his family. I realize that I’m drawing on Social Security that I paid in over the years so in other words I’m living off of my storehouse but it’s just not something that I’m comfortable doing.
I guess I should pray for peace in my life and for the Lord to give me clear guidance and direction for my life. Right now I feel I blew a huge opportunity to go back to school this semester but we were down to just one car. I hope and pray that changes soon.
The good news is that the first of the month is almost here and that means not only is it payday for Pam & I but we will have all of our W-2’s & 1099’s so we can file our income tax and get our refund back. This year we’re planning on getting my wife’s car going again, paying off a bunch of bills and just generally getting back on our feet financially! Yea, again!
Oh well, I’ve rambled on enough tonight!
Be Blessed!
BIG SCOTT
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Spiritual Drought
Have you ever been in a spiritual drought? You know, where no matter what you do it seems you just can’t get close to Jesus? Right now that’s where I’m at. I’m in a spiritual drought, again. I say again because this is not the first one that I’ve been in and who knows it may not be the last.
I describe a spiritual drought as being at a point in your spiritual life where you feel dry spiritually, not having the feeling of being close to God and not having the Holy Spirit filling your life with the living water that comes from God that we all thirst and long for. While I still long to draw close to Jesus it just seems that no matter what I do I just can’t draw close like I want to.
Why do I have these spiritual droughts? I’m not always for sure. Sometimes I wonder if it is the Lord testing me to see how I do on my own to see if I stay true and honest to Him. Sometimes I feel that it’s my fault as I’ve been disobedient in some way. Sometimes it may be a mixture of things and sometimes I don’t have clue why I’m in a spiritual drought.
I know that this time my spiritual drought is caused by a number of things. First, I’m about to pull my hair out trying to make ends meet financially while we wait on the full amount of our disability benefits to kick in. I know the scripture says not to worry but that is hard thing not to do! I also know that while I’m struggling to keep us afloat financially it takes time and energy away from me that I could be using to draw closer to the Lord via spending more time in the word and praying.
I know that it is the enemy keeping me worrying and I’ve got to put an end to it. However it’s not always a simple thing to do. One thing I do know however that as I shed light on the attacks of the enemy they will subside and eventually cease because now I’ve stated my failures and my weaknesses the Lord can now come in through the prayer of not only myself but my family and friends.
I know now that this drought is only temporary and that now I have spoken out about my drought this drought will soon end.
Let me encourage you that if you are or you get into a spiritual drought that you share where your at with others so they can pray with you and you too will be able to join me in the victory that is at hand!
You know… I feel better already!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
I describe a spiritual drought as being at a point in your spiritual life where you feel dry spiritually, not having the feeling of being close to God and not having the Holy Spirit filling your life with the living water that comes from God that we all thirst and long for. While I still long to draw close to Jesus it just seems that no matter what I do I just can’t draw close like I want to.
Why do I have these spiritual droughts? I’m not always for sure. Sometimes I wonder if it is the Lord testing me to see how I do on my own to see if I stay true and honest to Him. Sometimes I feel that it’s my fault as I’ve been disobedient in some way. Sometimes it may be a mixture of things and sometimes I don’t have clue why I’m in a spiritual drought.
I know that this time my spiritual drought is caused by a number of things. First, I’m about to pull my hair out trying to make ends meet financially while we wait on the full amount of our disability benefits to kick in. I know the scripture says not to worry but that is hard thing not to do! I also know that while I’m struggling to keep us afloat financially it takes time and energy away from me that I could be using to draw closer to the Lord via spending more time in the word and praying.
I know that it is the enemy keeping me worrying and I’ve got to put an end to it. However it’s not always a simple thing to do. One thing I do know however that as I shed light on the attacks of the enemy they will subside and eventually cease because now I’ve stated my failures and my weaknesses the Lord can now come in through the prayer of not only myself but my family and friends.
I know now that this drought is only temporary and that now I have spoken out about my drought this drought will soon end.
Let me encourage you that if you are or you get into a spiritual drought that you share where your at with others so they can pray with you and you too will be able to join me in the victory that is at hand!
You know… I feel better already!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Still Hanging On!
Good news! It’s two weeks in to the New Year and I still haven’t broken any of New Year’s resolutions. I’ve come close but I’m still on the wagon! I’m still striving to get closer to Jesus even though some days it feels like I’m a million miles away at least I’m still seeking. Every time I’ve weighed in so far I’ve lost weight, praise God!
I’m still struggling and I haven’t given up on my quest to get healthier. I went to the doctor Tuesday and the doctor was pleased with my progress and decided not to put me on insulin praise God. In addition we joined the YMCA again so now I can start working out again with my wife Pam!
As far as our Autistic son Andrew goes I’ve made some changes so I can help him out more. In addition we’ve found some outside support and we have a meeting once a week in our home to help out Andrew and starting next month we’re going to be going to and autistic support group once a month. I sure hope and pray I can make thing s go better as far as Andrew is concerned. He’s a handful but I still love him!
Of all of my resolutions that I made my fifth and last resolutions to share Jesus more seems to be going pretty good! I’ve passed out close to a hundred tracts this month already! I haven’t had the privilege to pray the sinner’s prayer with anyone this month yet but I do know that I’ve planted some really great seeds!
I hope this encourages you to keep on keeping on!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
I’m still struggling and I haven’t given up on my quest to get healthier. I went to the doctor Tuesday and the doctor was pleased with my progress and decided not to put me on insulin praise God. In addition we joined the YMCA again so now I can start working out again with my wife Pam!
As far as our Autistic son Andrew goes I’ve made some changes so I can help him out more. In addition we’ve found some outside support and we have a meeting once a week in our home to help out Andrew and starting next month we’re going to be going to and autistic support group once a month. I sure hope and pray I can make thing s go better as far as Andrew is concerned. He’s a handful but I still love him!
Of all of my resolutions that I made my fifth and last resolutions to share Jesus more seems to be going pretty good! I’ve passed out close to a hundred tracts this month already! I haven’t had the privilege to pray the sinner’s prayer with anyone this month yet but I do know that I’ve planted some really great seeds!
I hope this encourages you to keep on keeping on!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
Monday, January 12, 2009
Still Loosing to Win... Barely!!!
Don’t ask me how I’m doing it as I’m not sure but I’m still loosing weight. I weighed in again today and I weighed in right at 490 pounds. That’s 3 pounds since I weighed in last week and 40 pounds since I started two months ago. For that I need to thank God because I know it’s all him because I fell off the wagon way to many times this past two weeks to have done this well!
I had a heart to heart talk with my wife and she agreed not to make any more cakes, cookies, or sweets for a while. I explained to her that having an eating disorder is just like having an alcohol or drug addiction. If you expose someone who is trying to go clean day after day to drugs or alcohol they’re going to fall off of the wagon so to say. They’re going to fall right back into alcoholism or drug abuse.
It’s the same way when someone has an eating disorder. I’ve been fed all kinds of wonderful, great tasting food all of my life and I’ve never been taught moderation. Unlike drugs and alcohol you just can’t go cold turkey and quit eating food as you need food to survive. What you have to do is retrain your body and your mind to eat in moderation and even more importantly, eat the proper foods and drink the proper drinks.
There are foods out there that you can eat all you want and you won’t get fat. However there are many, many more foods out there that you shouldn’t touch with the proverbial ten foot pole if you’re trying to loose weight! For instance anything with refined sugars should be avoided at all costs while fresh veggies such as carrots, celery, radishes, green peppers and such can be sliced up and ate to your hearts content as long as you avoid the fattening dressings!
Right now I’m caught in quagmire of a trap. With our finite resources of us being on a set income every month we can’t afford many of the weight loss foods that I really need to be eating. So what I’m doing instead is watching my helping size and doing my best to eat in moderation.
Another thing that I need to be doing right now is that I need to get into a consistent and steady exercise program. Right now I try to walk two to three times a day. This is really hard on my knees and I’ll be glad when we get the money to get our YMCA membership back so I can do water aerobics as per the doctors orders. My doctor tells me that water exercises burns huge amounts of calories and will be low impact on my tired and arthritic knees. Praise God, I’ll be glad to get into that pool!
Anyway, I hope that by me being public with my struggles, sometime failures, and my triumphs I hope that I can encourage you and others to be successful too!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
I had a heart to heart talk with my wife and she agreed not to make any more cakes, cookies, or sweets for a while. I explained to her that having an eating disorder is just like having an alcohol or drug addiction. If you expose someone who is trying to go clean day after day to drugs or alcohol they’re going to fall off of the wagon so to say. They’re going to fall right back into alcoholism or drug abuse.
It’s the same way when someone has an eating disorder. I’ve been fed all kinds of wonderful, great tasting food all of my life and I’ve never been taught moderation. Unlike drugs and alcohol you just can’t go cold turkey and quit eating food as you need food to survive. What you have to do is retrain your body and your mind to eat in moderation and even more importantly, eat the proper foods and drink the proper drinks.
There are foods out there that you can eat all you want and you won’t get fat. However there are many, many more foods out there that you shouldn’t touch with the proverbial ten foot pole if you’re trying to loose weight! For instance anything with refined sugars should be avoided at all costs while fresh veggies such as carrots, celery, radishes, green peppers and such can be sliced up and ate to your hearts content as long as you avoid the fattening dressings!
Right now I’m caught in quagmire of a trap. With our finite resources of us being on a set income every month we can’t afford many of the weight loss foods that I really need to be eating. So what I’m doing instead is watching my helping size and doing my best to eat in moderation.
Another thing that I need to be doing right now is that I need to get into a consistent and steady exercise program. Right now I try to walk two to three times a day. This is really hard on my knees and I’ll be glad when we get the money to get our YMCA membership back so I can do water aerobics as per the doctors orders. My doctor tells me that water exercises burns huge amounts of calories and will be low impact on my tired and arthritic knees. Praise God, I’ll be glad to get into that pool!
Anyway, I hope that by me being public with my struggles, sometime failures, and my triumphs I hope that I can encourage you and others to be successful too!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
Saturday, January 03, 2009
Loosing To Win!
On Thursday, December 18 I wrote the following here in my blog. “One thing that I’m going to do to hold my self accountable is to keep putting updates on my blog here. If I make public what I’m doing then I will have a ton more willpower to be successful in my weight loss battle.” I decided wether I lost, gained, or stayed the same I was going to post it here. Besides, who better to hold me accountable then my readers!
Well, I have good news to report. Today was weigh in day and I weighed in at 497 pounds flully clothed. If you subtract for clothing, shoes, jacket & such you can safely subtract another 5 pounds which would put me at 492 pounds which means that over the past two weeks I lost 7 pounds! I just knew that with all of the great food we had during the holidays that I would have gained weight. But no, I lost 7 pounds praise God! That works out to ½ pound per day which is right where I want to be right now.
My goal now is to loose 50 pounds by the start of baseball season in early April so I can start umpiring again! I have really missed not umpiring the past two years and I can hardly wait to get back out there on the ball field! Besides, umpiring is good exercise and we can most deffinately use the extra money!!!
If your New Year’s resoloution is to loose weight let me know! I’d love to encourage you as I loose to win!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
Well, I have good news to report. Today was weigh in day and I weighed in at 497 pounds flully clothed. If you subtract for clothing, shoes, jacket & such you can safely subtract another 5 pounds which would put me at 492 pounds which means that over the past two weeks I lost 7 pounds! I just knew that with all of the great food we had during the holidays that I would have gained weight. But no, I lost 7 pounds praise God! That works out to ½ pound per day which is right where I want to be right now.
My goal now is to loose 50 pounds by the start of baseball season in early April so I can start umpiring again! I have really missed not umpiring the past two years and I can hardly wait to get back out there on the ball field! Besides, umpiring is good exercise and we can most deffinately use the extra money!!!
If your New Year’s resoloution is to loose weight let me know! I’d love to encourage you as I loose to win!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
Friday, January 02, 2009
Bipolar Update
It’s been a bit since I’ve wrote on how I’m doing with my bipolar & ADHD. Bipolar is one of those disorders that can be pretty hard to treat. It seems that any medication you take for bipolar disorder seems to have some pretty hefty side effects. The two biggest side effects seem to be messing with your blood sugar and totally messing up your sleeping patterns. Some can also cause you to have a dependence on them, especially Seroquel.
I’ve been on Seroquel now for right at three years for my bipolar. Seroquel is the number one prescribed medication for bipolar. The good news is that it does an awesome job controlling bipolar. The bad news is that the side effects stink! The worst side effect is that if you don’t have diabetes you’ll probably get it. Unbeknownst to me is that apparently for years I’ve been battling borderline diabetes & no one ever caught it. Now I’ve got full blown diabetes and will probably have to go on insulin sometime this month. Yuk!
The second side effect of Seroquel is that it makes an awesome sleeping pill! The bad news is that until you get used to it you have a really hard time waking up in the morning! I got so attached to Seroquel that when the doctor started weaning me off of Seroquel a month ago it really messed me up! To make the withdrawals less offensive the doctor dropped me from 300 mg. to 100 mg. daily. Next week I’ll go off of Seroquel completely.
I’ve got a friend who has been a diabetic all of her life & she was on 400 mg. of Seroquel & last week they took her off of Seroquel cold turkey. Her blood sugars dropped so low that she actually passed out a few times! My last hope to stay off of insulin is when I get off of Seroquel next week that my blood sugars will drop enough that I won’t have to go on insulin, I can maintain my blood sugars with medications (pills).
In the mean time while all of this is going on and we look for new meds that will help I can tell you my bipolar is back, sleep stinks. I either don’t sleep at all or I keep waking up all night long, every 1-2 hours and then I can hardly get up in the morning. I should also mention that my OCD (obsessive/compulsive disorder) is also starting to rear its ugly head, not real bad yet but I do notice it every once in a while!
To make matters worse, Abilify, the new to the market and new to me med that the doctor put me on to replace Seroquel has now just released the same warning about diabetes that Seroquel has. Now I get to look forward to changing meds again! Double Yuk!
The good news now is that the kids all go back to school this Monday so I’ll have time to work with my doc’s to get things straightened out, again!
Anyway, if you happen to think about me when you’re doing your prayers please ask the Lord to help my doctors get things straightened out.
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
I’ve been on Seroquel now for right at three years for my bipolar. Seroquel is the number one prescribed medication for bipolar. The good news is that it does an awesome job controlling bipolar. The bad news is that the side effects stink! The worst side effect is that if you don’t have diabetes you’ll probably get it. Unbeknownst to me is that apparently for years I’ve been battling borderline diabetes & no one ever caught it. Now I’ve got full blown diabetes and will probably have to go on insulin sometime this month. Yuk!
The second side effect of Seroquel is that it makes an awesome sleeping pill! The bad news is that until you get used to it you have a really hard time waking up in the morning! I got so attached to Seroquel that when the doctor started weaning me off of Seroquel a month ago it really messed me up! To make the withdrawals less offensive the doctor dropped me from 300 mg. to 100 mg. daily. Next week I’ll go off of Seroquel completely.
I’ve got a friend who has been a diabetic all of her life & she was on 400 mg. of Seroquel & last week they took her off of Seroquel cold turkey. Her blood sugars dropped so low that she actually passed out a few times! My last hope to stay off of insulin is when I get off of Seroquel next week that my blood sugars will drop enough that I won’t have to go on insulin, I can maintain my blood sugars with medications (pills).
In the mean time while all of this is going on and we look for new meds that will help I can tell you my bipolar is back, sleep stinks. I either don’t sleep at all or I keep waking up all night long, every 1-2 hours and then I can hardly get up in the morning. I should also mention that my OCD (obsessive/compulsive disorder) is also starting to rear its ugly head, not real bad yet but I do notice it every once in a while!
To make matters worse, Abilify, the new to the market and new to me med that the doctor put me on to replace Seroquel has now just released the same warning about diabetes that Seroquel has. Now I get to look forward to changing meds again! Double Yuk!
The good news now is that the kids all go back to school this Monday so I’ll have time to work with my doc’s to get things straightened out, again!
Anyway, if you happen to think about me when you’re doing your prayers please ask the Lord to help my doctors get things straightened out.
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)