Who do you have in your life that makes your day brighter? God sends people into our lives to cheer us up. Stop and think about it, we all have someone who makes our day go better. Sometimes it our spouses or someone else in our family that cheers us up. And then at other times it can be a friend, a coworker, a pastor, just about anyone God can send our way to cheer us up.
I’ve been told over and over again that I am so blessed to have a wife that lifts me up. I know it’s true as the first person I see when I wake up in the morning is the light of my life! When I’m down my wife’s brightness reaches down into my depression, shines light into my life, and lifts me up! It’s not just me, my wife is just one of those people that others love to be around!
I talk a lot about my Care Team. One person on my Care Team that I talk with several times a week, mainly because we’re also friends is my Pastor. Once again I am blessed here too because God has brought a Pastor into our lives that is on a permanent high, high on Jesus! My pastor can just look deep into my soul and in a few minutes can have me smiling, even on a really bad day, by speaking the perfect, God given words that I not only need to hear, but many times also brings healing that God has for me.
It’s not just those people that you see on a regular basis that can lift you up. Today while I was waiting to pick my daughter up at school my niece pulled in to pick up her oldest son too. My niece is awesome, and that’s probably an understatement! This gal is so full of Jesus that she just bubbles over in life, joy, and happiness! I started the day down and by the time I had finished visiting with my niece I had absorbed a huge junk of her great big smile and I too had a great big smile on my face!
Think about who it is in your life that lifts you up. Make a mental note of those people. When you’re feeling down, expect God to bring some of these people or someone like them into your life. God is a God of love. God wants you to have a joyful heart. Psalm 5:11 jumps out at me tonight: “But let all who take refuge in you rejoice; let them sing joyful praises forever. Protect them, so all who love your name may be filled with joy.”
I know that I know this is for someone out there. I don’t know who it is. If it’s you, Praise God! If not, find someone today, pass this on, and be that person to them!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Sunday, October 30, 2005
Communication
Communication is key in anything that you do. I’ve noticed that with today’s hectic, busy lifestyle sometimes people don’t communicate like they should. For those of us that have ADHD it’s just magnified over and over. One of the first coping strategies that I learned after my ADHD diagnosis is that I need to write everything down.
I’ve started making notes about a week before I have an appointment with one of the docs on my Care Team about problems I’m having and also too about what seems to be working. I also make notes on my symptoms. Then with about two or three days before those appointments I’ll pull all of my notes together and start trying to put everything on one sheet. On the night before my appointment I’ll write out one sheet using my computer so that when I go see my doc I can hand this sheet to either my doc or their nurse.
Using this method I’ve found that I can get more done in the twenty minutes that I’m normally allotted then I had got done in twice that time before. Not to mention I don’t have to try and remember everything that I want to talk about. In addition my docs have a sheet they can put in my file and look back on too. My docs love it and so do I! My wife is even impressed that I’m getting organized this well!
Just a quick little tidbit I thought that I’d throw out in hope that it may help someone!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
I’ve started making notes about a week before I have an appointment with one of the docs on my Care Team about problems I’m having and also too about what seems to be working. I also make notes on my symptoms. Then with about two or three days before those appointments I’ll pull all of my notes together and start trying to put everything on one sheet. On the night before my appointment I’ll write out one sheet using my computer so that when I go see my doc I can hand this sheet to either my doc or their nurse.
Using this method I’ve found that I can get more done in the twenty minutes that I’m normally allotted then I had got done in twice that time before. Not to mention I don’t have to try and remember everything that I want to talk about. In addition my docs have a sheet they can put in my file and look back on too. My docs love it and so do I! My wife is even impressed that I’m getting organized this well!
Just a quick little tidbit I thought that I’d throw out in hope that it may help someone!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
Saturday, October 29, 2005
mIxEd sTaTeS
I have been buried deep in what’s known as a Mixed State the last two weeks or so. Mixed States happen when one is experiencing both manic episodes and depression at the same time. This is especially true with persons that are Bipolar II. Normally I am in a Mixed State about one quarter to one third of the time. Needless to say, one can feel very confused when one is in the Mixed States mode. A common feeling that I get when I am in the Mixed States mode being very jittery, on edge, but yet have low drive or ambition to do anything. It’s been a long time since I’ve been stuck in a Mixed State for so long.
I think I’m starting to drive my poor wife nuts. One minute I’ll be down and the next thing you know I have a manic attack and do something totally off of the wall. I guess the good news is that at least I’m having some manic time. My manic times can get pretty hilarious at times. Sometimes I feel like I’m caught in outtakes from the old Disney/Pixar movie “Monster’s Inc.”
I know the last two days my life would definitely have to be the Monster’s Inc. outtakes because it was way too wacky to make the final cut! In the mornings lately I’ve had a hard time getting enough energy & enthusiasm to get out of bed but yet during the day I’ll be bouncing around like a manic Scully. You remember Scully don’t you? Scully was that great big blue, lovable, huggable monster?
Lately I feel like, “Yup, that’s me! I'm sometimes scary, sometimes huggable, & sometimes laughable funny!” I guess the good news is that when my wife lets me out of the house I usually turn into that laughable monster. Lately, no one has been safe from my zany antics & humor.
My wife & I went to the bread store today. We no more then walked into the bread store and I ran into another Mr. Manic. I have never met this guy before in my life that I know of but he said something and I keyed off on him and it only took about 20 seconds and we had every poor person in that store just rolling in laughter. It was all our respective wives could do to separate us! I felt sorry for the poor gal that runs the bread store. She was bent over laughing so hard that I thought she was going to hurt herself.
Oh well, leave it to God to give you laughter to balance out the pain! Thank You Jesus for giving me a way to get through the pain. I do have a new prayer now though…
Dear Jesus, Please give everyone else a way to escape my manic comedy!
I feel better now!
Thank You Jesus!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
I think I’m starting to drive my poor wife nuts. One minute I’ll be down and the next thing you know I have a manic attack and do something totally off of the wall. I guess the good news is that at least I’m having some manic time. My manic times can get pretty hilarious at times. Sometimes I feel like I’m caught in outtakes from the old Disney/Pixar movie “Monster’s Inc.”
I know the last two days my life would definitely have to be the Monster’s Inc. outtakes because it was way too wacky to make the final cut! In the mornings lately I’ve had a hard time getting enough energy & enthusiasm to get out of bed but yet during the day I’ll be bouncing around like a manic Scully. You remember Scully don’t you? Scully was that great big blue, lovable, huggable monster?
Lately I feel like, “Yup, that’s me! I'm sometimes scary, sometimes huggable, & sometimes laughable funny!” I guess the good news is that when my wife lets me out of the house I usually turn into that laughable monster. Lately, no one has been safe from my zany antics & humor.
My wife & I went to the bread store today. We no more then walked into the bread store and I ran into another Mr. Manic. I have never met this guy before in my life that I know of but he said something and I keyed off on him and it only took about 20 seconds and we had every poor person in that store just rolling in laughter. It was all our respective wives could do to separate us! I felt sorry for the poor gal that runs the bread store. She was bent over laughing so hard that I thought she was going to hurt herself.
Oh well, leave it to God to give you laughter to balance out the pain! Thank You Jesus for giving me a way to get through the pain. I do have a new prayer now though…
Dear Jesus, Please give everyone else a way to escape my manic comedy!
I feel better now!
Thank You Jesus!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
Thursday, October 27, 2005
It's Fall!
Does anyone enjoy Fall as much as I do? Fall is such a beautiful time here in Kansas. With all of the awesome color in the trees in such it is hard not to just love this time of the year. The temps are not to hot and most of the time the temps are not that cold either. Pants & a sweater, you’re ready to enjoy Fall.
Here in Kansas we are so blessed by God! In the wide open Plains of Western Kansas Fall produces some of the most breathtaking sunrises and sunsets one will ever see! The super-huge, burnt orange fireball that we call the sun is spectacular this time of year whether it is early morning at sunrise of early evening at sunset. It’s a sight you’ll treasure in your heart all of your life.
If by chance you happen to be in South Central Kansas and can afford the gas, head east out of Wichita on US 400. About 45 miles east of Wichita you come to the little town of Beaumont. About one mile east of Beaumont you come upon what’s known as Beaumont Hill. Beaumont Hill is Kansas’ version of the Grand Canyon. Although no where near as big as the Grand Canyon, the view you get here is spectacular to say the least.
As you travel east through Beaumont Hill on US 400, the next 40 miles or so are breathtaking! From Beaumont to Fredonia US 400 is lined on both sides with hill after hill of Oak, Poplar, Walnut, & Cherry trees. The variation in this fall foliage is something I anxiously await every year! I should add that many sections of US 160 & US 166 in South Central & Southeast Kansas are just as spectacular with their own variation of Fall foliage!
If by chance you ever travel US 60/I-70 from Colorado to Missouri you’ll find a gradual transformation from the flat, wide open prairies in Western Kansas slowly giving way to gentle rolling hills by the time you get to I-135. From I-135 East the hills slowly become slightly more prevalent and the foliage thickens. By the time you get to Manhattan you have the opportunity to choose any number of scenic routes to continue your travels on eastward. If you time it right, you’ll pop up over the hills and you’ll see the lights of Kansas City sprawling out before you and the last vestige of sunlight fading over your shoulders.
Yes, we truly are blessed to live in such a beautiful state! It’s Fall in Kansas. Pick a direction, any direction. You won’t have to travel far and you’ll find some of the most breathtaking beauty you will ever find in this world! It’s a beautiful world out there right now, don’t miss it!!!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
Here in Kansas we are so blessed by God! In the wide open Plains of Western Kansas Fall produces some of the most breathtaking sunrises and sunsets one will ever see! The super-huge, burnt orange fireball that we call the sun is spectacular this time of year whether it is early morning at sunrise of early evening at sunset. It’s a sight you’ll treasure in your heart all of your life.
If by chance you happen to be in South Central Kansas and can afford the gas, head east out of Wichita on US 400. About 45 miles east of Wichita you come to the little town of Beaumont. About one mile east of Beaumont you come upon what’s known as Beaumont Hill. Beaumont Hill is Kansas’ version of the Grand Canyon. Although no where near as big as the Grand Canyon, the view you get here is spectacular to say the least.
As you travel east through Beaumont Hill on US 400, the next 40 miles or so are breathtaking! From Beaumont to Fredonia US 400 is lined on both sides with hill after hill of Oak, Poplar, Walnut, & Cherry trees. The variation in this fall foliage is something I anxiously await every year! I should add that many sections of US 160 & US 166 in South Central & Southeast Kansas are just as spectacular with their own variation of Fall foliage!
If by chance you ever travel US 60/I-70 from Colorado to Missouri you’ll find a gradual transformation from the flat, wide open prairies in Western Kansas slowly giving way to gentle rolling hills by the time you get to I-135. From I-135 East the hills slowly become slightly more prevalent and the foliage thickens. By the time you get to Manhattan you have the opportunity to choose any number of scenic routes to continue your travels on eastward. If you time it right, you’ll pop up over the hills and you’ll see the lights of Kansas City sprawling out before you and the last vestige of sunlight fading over your shoulders.
Yes, we truly are blessed to live in such a beautiful state! It’s Fall in Kansas. Pick a direction, any direction. You won’t have to travel far and you’ll find some of the most breathtaking beauty you will ever find in this world! It’s a beautiful world out there right now, don’t miss it!!!
Be Blessed!!!
BIG SCOTT
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Rosa Parks
One thing to keep in mind about Rosa Parks is that through her braveness and resolution to stand for what's right we all have a better nation with equality for all. Those of us with mental disorders owe Rosa Parks a great deal of gratitude. When Rosa Parks sparked the civil rights movement, the movement that ensued did much more then just bring forth equality for blacks. What Rosa Parks did was spark a movement for every person in the United States that are either a part of a minority or in fact have some form of disability.
Every movement towards equality has its roots deep in Alabama in the 1950’s. If Rosa Parks had not refused to give up her seat that day nearly fifty years ago, December 1st, 1955 in Montgomery, Alabama, the road to true equality and freedom in this country may have taken a great deal of time longer to start. Rosa Parks was the spark that lit a flame.
What Rosa Parks did moved a young Baptist preacher to move to action. That young Baptist preacher was the Reverend Martin Luther King. What the Reverend Martin Luther King did was to organize the Montgomery Bus Boycott. The Montgomery Bus Boycott spread throughout the nation and a year after Rosa Parks' refusal to give up her seat to a white man, the Supreme Court of the United States ruled that segregation on public transportation was indeed unconstitutional.
What happened after that landmark court ruling would take books and books to record. So many people have received so much more freedom due in part to what one black seamstress did that one fateful day in 1955. Through it all Rosa Parks remained very humble. What an incredible lady Rosa Parks was. Rosa Parks was a lady that so many people such as myself owe so very much too.
It’s a good thing that there is no conception of time in Heaven because I truly believe that there is going to be a long line of people waiting to say “Thanks” to Rosa Parks. I just thank God that He gave us Rosa Parks for 92 years.
Rosa Parks
1912-2005
Every movement towards equality has its roots deep in Alabama in the 1950’s. If Rosa Parks had not refused to give up her seat that day nearly fifty years ago, December 1st, 1955 in Montgomery, Alabama, the road to true equality and freedom in this country may have taken a great deal of time longer to start. Rosa Parks was the spark that lit a flame.
What Rosa Parks did moved a young Baptist preacher to move to action. That young Baptist preacher was the Reverend Martin Luther King. What the Reverend Martin Luther King did was to organize the Montgomery Bus Boycott. The Montgomery Bus Boycott spread throughout the nation and a year after Rosa Parks' refusal to give up her seat to a white man, the Supreme Court of the United States ruled that segregation on public transportation was indeed unconstitutional.
What happened after that landmark court ruling would take books and books to record. So many people have received so much more freedom due in part to what one black seamstress did that one fateful day in 1955. Through it all Rosa Parks remained very humble. What an incredible lady Rosa Parks was. Rosa Parks was a lady that so many people such as myself owe so very much too.
It’s a good thing that there is no conception of time in Heaven because I truly believe that there is going to be a long line of people waiting to say “Thanks” to Rosa Parks. I just thank God that He gave us Rosa Parks for 92 years.
Rosa Parks
1912-2005
Monday, October 24, 2005
Question & Answer About Porn
I just received these three questions:
“What is your view on porn? Is there anything wrong with it (porn)? Can someone be addicted (to porn)?"
Praise God these questions came my way! As one who has been down the porn road and now set free, I feel God has given me a unique perspective and insight to address this issue. Here is my reply I sent. This may come as a shock to some as you read through my reply but it is a reply that tells how I was set free and can set other captives free!
_______________________________________________
Porn can be and is VERY addictive. I was hooked on porn from the time I was about 14 up until about 9 months ago. Porn has destroyed so very much in my life I wouldn't know where to start. Being BPII w/ a very heavy manic side, I came very close several times to having a run in with the law. Why I never got in trouble with the law is beyond me. The only thing that I can think of that saved me from traveling down that terrible road was God.
I tried being a Christian, a husband, & a good father while hooked on porn. Where did it get me? I was kicked out of church, divorced, & separated from my kids. That's what porn does. It screws with your mind and your sense of reality.
What saved me from porn? God. Pure, plain, & simple! When I hit the end of my rope so to say and had nothing else to live for earlier this year I just simply gave up. My wife who divorced me in 1996 and remarried me in December of 1999 believing that somehow I still had some redeeming value in me and that I did indeed need to be the father that God has called me to be took me in to the local mental health crisis center early this year.
What happened was I was very close to suicide. I didn’t care. I had nothing to loose. I said “What the hell? Here’s what I’ve done. Here’s what I feel. And here’s what I’m taking (abusing).” I laid it all out. The porn addiction. The OTC speed addiction. The self mutilation addiction that was a result of the porn addiction. I threw it all out there just to show how screwed up I had gotten myself. I had the “Here, YOU deal with it” attitude!
Little did I know that what I was doing was the single most freeing thing that I could do. I dumped it all. I held nothing back. I told my P-doc, my talk doc, my Pastor, & I even told our family doc some of it. The one person that I expected that would be the most likely to give me the boot or explode all over me was the one that cared the most. That was our Pastor.
The care that our Pastor took to make sure I got treatment, to talk with me, to love on me, to lift me up when I got down was more then I could have ever imagined! The problem is that our Pastor has seen way too many men get caught in the snare, the trap of porn and have their whole lives ruined. Mine was ruined here too. The difference was our Pastor had an opportunity to be Jesus to me, to free me from the trap, the snare that had so entangled me.
Being BP has an absurdly, seriously, dangerous side. When you’re on the high, manic side of BP you’ll crave porn just like a crack addict craves crack. When you’re on the down, depression side of BP having the porn addiction is just more thing to come in and pound you down. With BP & porn there is no middle ground. That’s what makes porn so absurdly, seriously, dangerous.
My advice to anyone with a porn addiction, especially those that are BP, tell your P-doc, your talk-doc, your Pastor, a close friend, your spouse if you have one. Tell someone that is willing to help you beat this addiction. Beating this addiction is going to be just like beating an alcohol or drug addiction. Why do I say that? Because porn causes dopamine to be released in the brain causing a drug high that your body naturally produces.
Another problem with porn is that it is somewhat culturally accepted and it is pretty much legal. So is the OTC (over the counter) speed pills I was hooked on. So are cigarettes. So on and so forth. They will all kill you. Period! How will porn kill you? For starters if you get deep enough into porn, which is so very easy to do and you won’t know it until it’s too late, is that porn can lead to such severe depression that one may very well commit suicide or at least try.
The good news is that I found something to replace that high I was getting from porn. This is a high that is better then any high porn or drugs could ever give me. This high has no end. This high is not destructive. This high is in fact very good for you. This high has brought me a ton of healing. What is this high? This high is Jesus!
If you’re playing around with porn, STOP!!! If you can’t stop, you need help. Like I said earlier, get help! This is your life. Don’t loose it over porn!
I hope and pray that hits home with some!
Be Blessed!
BIG
“What is your view on porn? Is there anything wrong with it (porn)? Can someone be addicted (to porn)?"
Praise God these questions came my way! As one who has been down the porn road and now set free, I feel God has given me a unique perspective and insight to address this issue. Here is my reply I sent. This may come as a shock to some as you read through my reply but it is a reply that tells how I was set free and can set other captives free!
_______________________________________________
Porn can be and is VERY addictive. I was hooked on porn from the time I was about 14 up until about 9 months ago. Porn has destroyed so very much in my life I wouldn't know where to start. Being BPII w/ a very heavy manic side, I came very close several times to having a run in with the law. Why I never got in trouble with the law is beyond me. The only thing that I can think of that saved me from traveling down that terrible road was God.
I tried being a Christian, a husband, & a good father while hooked on porn. Where did it get me? I was kicked out of church, divorced, & separated from my kids. That's what porn does. It screws with your mind and your sense of reality.
What saved me from porn? God. Pure, plain, & simple! When I hit the end of my rope so to say and had nothing else to live for earlier this year I just simply gave up. My wife who divorced me in 1996 and remarried me in December of 1999 believing that somehow I still had some redeeming value in me and that I did indeed need to be the father that God has called me to be took me in to the local mental health crisis center early this year.
What happened was I was very close to suicide. I didn’t care. I had nothing to loose. I said “What the hell? Here’s what I’ve done. Here’s what I feel. And here’s what I’m taking (abusing).” I laid it all out. The porn addiction. The OTC speed addiction. The self mutilation addiction that was a result of the porn addiction. I threw it all out there just to show how screwed up I had gotten myself. I had the “Here, YOU deal with it” attitude!
Little did I know that what I was doing was the single most freeing thing that I could do. I dumped it all. I held nothing back. I told my P-doc, my talk doc, my Pastor, & I even told our family doc some of it. The one person that I expected that would be the most likely to give me the boot or explode all over me was the one that cared the most. That was our Pastor.
The care that our Pastor took to make sure I got treatment, to talk with me, to love on me, to lift me up when I got down was more then I could have ever imagined! The problem is that our Pastor has seen way too many men get caught in the snare, the trap of porn and have their whole lives ruined. Mine was ruined here too. The difference was our Pastor had an opportunity to be Jesus to me, to free me from the trap, the snare that had so entangled me.
Being BP has an absurdly, seriously, dangerous side. When you’re on the high, manic side of BP you’ll crave porn just like a crack addict craves crack. When you’re on the down, depression side of BP having the porn addiction is just more thing to come in and pound you down. With BP & porn there is no middle ground. That’s what makes porn so absurdly, seriously, dangerous.
My advice to anyone with a porn addiction, especially those that are BP, tell your P-doc, your talk-doc, your Pastor, a close friend, your spouse if you have one. Tell someone that is willing to help you beat this addiction. Beating this addiction is going to be just like beating an alcohol or drug addiction. Why do I say that? Because porn causes dopamine to be released in the brain causing a drug high that your body naturally produces.
Another problem with porn is that it is somewhat culturally accepted and it is pretty much legal. So is the OTC (over the counter) speed pills I was hooked on. So are cigarettes. So on and so forth. They will all kill you. Period! How will porn kill you? For starters if you get deep enough into porn, which is so very easy to do and you won’t know it until it’s too late, is that porn can lead to such severe depression that one may very well commit suicide or at least try.
The good news is that I found something to replace that high I was getting from porn. This is a high that is better then any high porn or drugs could ever give me. This high has no end. This high is not destructive. This high is in fact very good for you. This high has brought me a ton of healing. What is this high? This high is Jesus!
If you’re playing around with porn, STOP!!! If you can’t stop, you need help. Like I said earlier, get help! This is your life. Don’t loose it over porn!
I hope and pray that hits home with some!
Be Blessed!
BIG
Frustrating...
If I had to describe life using only one word I’d have to use the word “Frustrating.” As I chat online and talk with others in this world we call Bi-Polar Disorder I know I’m not alone. But for some reason I seriously doubt that those of us with a mental disorder are the only ones that would describe life this way. In fact we may have a couple of advantages. First, at least we’ve got an excuse! Second, most of us are already seeking treatment and therapy which means that at least we have someone to turn to in our times of distress.
I’ve just been frustrated lately with my job situation. Along with bipolar disorder I’m also ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder). Being bipolar & ADHD means that even when I’m on the down swing of my bipolar, I’m still pretty hyper. This is what the doctors call a “mixed state.” On the flip side of this, when I’m on the upswing of my bipolar I can get totally manic and bouncing off the walls! This is where the Seroquel that I take really comes into play.
Seroquel is a huge blessing from God for not only me but my family and friends too as I can do a pretty decent job of staying under control. Even with Seoquel though I still sometimes still have a pretty hard time concentrating and paying attention to the details and being good at tasks that take a great deal of concentration. This has got me in trouble over and over again at work and cost me a bunch of good jobs. This is what probably cost me my last job and why I do get frustrated at times.
Fortunately my Pdoc and her nurse are monitoring me very closely and working with me and my talk doc to help me through this and to conquer this for the first time ever in my life. I’m getting better but I’m frustrated that I’m not there yet. I guess Jesus is teaching me patience as I wait on my healing.
I guess that I’m doubly blessed. I’ve got two places to turn to when things get to overwhelming and I get too frustrated. I am scheduled at least on bi-weekly bases to spend time with my counselor or therapist (Tdoc) if you will. But what do I do if I need someone to talk to in my moment of need? I have the advantage of having a loving and caring God to turn to! I know that Jesus is there for me 24/7/365!
Be bipolar I sometimes have times of great depression that are deeper then my meds can lift me up. It times like this that I know that I can find comfort in my Bible. I open my Bible, let the Holy Spirit lead me, and without fail, God speaks to me through his word and I am comforted. Likewise, when I’m manic, which is where I’m at most of the time, I know I can grab my headphones, tune in to Air1, and chill out with my Christian rock!
I’ve heard it said that if a person has to take meds on a long term basis such as I do that we’re just not trusting in Jesus for our healing. Hogwash! I have no choice other then to trust in Jesus. If it wasn’t for Jesus I’d be sunk because for me to have enough meds to keep me in control I’d literally be a zombie! All I can tell you is that Jesus chooses how to heal in his own special and unique way.
I’ve seen a bunch of people prayed over and healed. I’m one of them. In 1990 I crushed a disc in my lower back and two vertebrae grew together. In 1997 I had a set of lower back x-rays from the same doc that shot my x-rays seven years earlier. That doctor thought for sure that he had the wrong set of x-rays in 1997 when he found that the two vertebrae were no longer fused and the disc had grown back. My doctor told me he had never seen that happen before and he had been in practice close to forty years!
Sometime Jesus chooses to bring comfort. I was born with a mild case of spina-bifida. I’ve got three vertebrae in my lower back that never quite grew together. Two of these were the ones that had the crushed disc between them and were healed. Jesus chose to heal the vertebrae but not the spina-bifida. Why? I don’t have a clue. All I know is that I have to trust Jesus on a daily basis to bring me comfort in my back.
Other times I see Jesus work through doctors. The apostle Luke was a physician. This is what I know that Jesus has chosen to do for me in the case of my bipolar disorder. I am receiving treatment both from doctors and from Jesus’ Holy Spirit. That’s what I talked about earlier. Through the doctors I get my meds which smoothes out the highs and the lows, or should I say makes the roller coaster ride not so wild! Then along with that I get the ministering of God’s Holy Spirit that really keeps me going along in as normal a matter as I could ever hope for.
I know that Jesus put doctors on this earth to help us physically. I believe that doctors are another tool for Jesus to use in his healing of us. Unfortunately, there is sin in this world that prevents God’s perfect will from taking place. That won’t happen until the end as is talked about in Revelation 20 & 21. But until that time I can keep trusting in and receiving my healing from Jesus, however Jesus chooses to bring me my healing.
Having to face my diagnosis alone without Jesus is a very scary thought! It’s a thought that I praise Jesus that I don’t have to face! I have a loving and caring Savior, who is my Father in Heaven. I love my Father and my Father loves me. I know my Father wants the best for me, his child. Knowing that, no matter what else happens, I am blessed!
I hope you’re blessed too!
Oh… Now that you mention it, I’m a little less frustrated now that I think about it!
As Always…
Be Blessed!
BIG SCOTT
P.S. Happy 4? Birthday To My Loving Wife Pam!!!
I’ve just been frustrated lately with my job situation. Along with bipolar disorder I’m also ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder). Being bipolar & ADHD means that even when I’m on the down swing of my bipolar, I’m still pretty hyper. This is what the doctors call a “mixed state.” On the flip side of this, when I’m on the upswing of my bipolar I can get totally manic and bouncing off the walls! This is where the Seroquel that I take really comes into play.
Seroquel is a huge blessing from God for not only me but my family and friends too as I can do a pretty decent job of staying under control. Even with Seoquel though I still sometimes still have a pretty hard time concentrating and paying attention to the details and being good at tasks that take a great deal of concentration. This has got me in trouble over and over again at work and cost me a bunch of good jobs. This is what probably cost me my last job and why I do get frustrated at times.
Fortunately my Pdoc and her nurse are monitoring me very closely and working with me and my talk doc to help me through this and to conquer this for the first time ever in my life. I’m getting better but I’m frustrated that I’m not there yet. I guess Jesus is teaching me patience as I wait on my healing.
I guess that I’m doubly blessed. I’ve got two places to turn to when things get to overwhelming and I get too frustrated. I am scheduled at least on bi-weekly bases to spend time with my counselor or therapist (Tdoc) if you will. But what do I do if I need someone to talk to in my moment of need? I have the advantage of having a loving and caring God to turn to! I know that Jesus is there for me 24/7/365!
Be bipolar I sometimes have times of great depression that are deeper then my meds can lift me up. It times like this that I know that I can find comfort in my Bible. I open my Bible, let the Holy Spirit lead me, and without fail, God speaks to me through his word and I am comforted. Likewise, when I’m manic, which is where I’m at most of the time, I know I can grab my headphones, tune in to Air1, and chill out with my Christian rock!
I’ve heard it said that if a person has to take meds on a long term basis such as I do that we’re just not trusting in Jesus for our healing. Hogwash! I have no choice other then to trust in Jesus. If it wasn’t for Jesus I’d be sunk because for me to have enough meds to keep me in control I’d literally be a zombie! All I can tell you is that Jesus chooses how to heal in his own special and unique way.
I’ve seen a bunch of people prayed over and healed. I’m one of them. In 1990 I crushed a disc in my lower back and two vertebrae grew together. In 1997 I had a set of lower back x-rays from the same doc that shot my x-rays seven years earlier. That doctor thought for sure that he had the wrong set of x-rays in 1997 when he found that the two vertebrae were no longer fused and the disc had grown back. My doctor told me he had never seen that happen before and he had been in practice close to forty years!
Sometime Jesus chooses to bring comfort. I was born with a mild case of spina-bifida. I’ve got three vertebrae in my lower back that never quite grew together. Two of these were the ones that had the crushed disc between them and were healed. Jesus chose to heal the vertebrae but not the spina-bifida. Why? I don’t have a clue. All I know is that I have to trust Jesus on a daily basis to bring me comfort in my back.
Other times I see Jesus work through doctors. The apostle Luke was a physician. This is what I know that Jesus has chosen to do for me in the case of my bipolar disorder. I am receiving treatment both from doctors and from Jesus’ Holy Spirit. That’s what I talked about earlier. Through the doctors I get my meds which smoothes out the highs and the lows, or should I say makes the roller coaster ride not so wild! Then along with that I get the ministering of God’s Holy Spirit that really keeps me going along in as normal a matter as I could ever hope for.
I know that Jesus put doctors on this earth to help us physically. I believe that doctors are another tool for Jesus to use in his healing of us. Unfortunately, there is sin in this world that prevents God’s perfect will from taking place. That won’t happen until the end as is talked about in Revelation 20 & 21. But until that time I can keep trusting in and receiving my healing from Jesus, however Jesus chooses to bring me my healing.
Having to face my diagnosis alone without Jesus is a very scary thought! It’s a thought that I praise Jesus that I don’t have to face! I have a loving and caring Savior, who is my Father in Heaven. I love my Father and my Father loves me. I know my Father wants the best for me, his child. Knowing that, no matter what else happens, I am blessed!
I hope you’re blessed too!
Oh… Now that you mention it, I’m a little less frustrated now that I think about it!
As Always…
Be Blessed!
BIG SCOTT
P.S. Happy 4? Birthday To My Loving Wife Pam!!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)